Tuesday, August 31, 2010
I'm on the phone last night with stripper daughter chatting about our day and Bikram yoga. At a wedding last summer she went around asking guys IF they were virgins. She wanted to shock guys with her question! Are you a virgin? Shocking statement from an over 30 topless stripper in Utah. She wants to screw a virgin.
Yesterday, it took forever for "Mr. V" to see me. When it takes forever they're a con artist or nervous. He was nervous. He had a mature fantasy story for video with an older woman like myself. He was not sure if he wanted light domination so it went TLC vanilla. Although, I lead it all the way, til he boned me. Afterwards he told me it was his first time and he's not a virgin anymore. Too wild. I have done a few virgins in my life time but not recorded it.
I told my daughter and she told me how she wants to screw a virgin. She will! I know her intentions. She's outgoing and bold. It will happen, so get ready boys.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Saturday, I'm tired and want to sleep in but did my live cam show this moring. Doing the Bikram challenge is very time and energy consuming. I was not in the mood to post my porn update. I had to redo my www.zoezane.com pix and vid update, finally got it done. I left it for a Starbucks break. After Starbucks I got in my car and lost a donut. What the uck? Too funny. I drove over to Dads house to see how it is going. Looking great the clean up, but there are termites in the outdoor dark house. On the inside of the dark room is a piece of mid century art. Shall I ask my brother for the art of just take it and see what happens?
Bikram has created a yoga community for hard working, sweaty human beings. It's the one place where I see people taking responsibility for their lives. If you have injuries, emotional crap, a bad back.....this yoga will fix it and YOU! Sometimes when the crap comes out it's hell. When it comes out you are ready to handle it so keep going. Some on at yoga will show up and help you. It has happened many times for me over and over. Every emotional experience it stored in your cells and on your spine. You might get more depressed then laugh more, get hateful angry then sing love songs to yourself, cry then give an animal a big hug, want to yell so kiss yourself a 100 times, or crawl into a corner and hide(look yourself right in the eyes in a mirror and tell yourself you're beautiful or handome). Whatever comes out it was not you and they were wrong. It's very important to focus on positive and good stuff. Controlling your mind is the big challenge. On October 12, 2010, his Holiness the Dalai Lama will be in San Jose. He will talk about happiness, the heart and changing the brain, making connections with one another. I will take a pen and paper for notes.
Today is Sunday and I will take it easy today. I will let you know what happens with the art over at Dads house.
I weeded Dads yard and sprayed water on the outside walls and screen doors. Got ride of more spiders and cob webs. It looks beautiful when you walk up the the front door. I'm moving the energy of Dads house to a higher vibration. It makes me so happy. Let's see if my brother see the differnece. I'm waiting to see if HE sees a differnece, EVEN takes NOTICE.
Friday, August 27, 2010
She had an affair, he was not punished, she's sentenced to prison 10 years and beat 100 times. She was stoned to death in public. This is old news like 2 months. It is still going on. This is SO barbaric it makes me cry. Little do these countries know what they're doing to coming generations. What future generations, IF they keep killing the women. There will be no life at all. This disrespect for the female and life is a crime. These countries who let men kill their women are murderers. They show their children how to kill their mothers and don't care. How do we stop this? Disrespect of this kind, is disrespect for all women on this planet. How about ship off all the women/children and let the murdering men butt fuck themselves!
Thursday, August 26, 2010
On my stats for Alexa it mentions that men from 55-65 search the site more than younger men. I know younger men are horny for older women BC I talk to them all the time. I see them doing quick glances at the store. Maybe the yonger men are so horny they do not fill out the questions for Alexa. Probably. They just want you!
Yesterday was Day 54 for my 60 straight days of Bikram yoga. I am tired. I layed down as much as possible yesterday. The summer heat has wiped me out. In class the sweetess jesture came my way. A younger male Bikram teacher, between the poses, moved quickly back to my mat in the back, and gave me the biggest hug. It was just what I needed. Hugs during the 60 day challenge are so uplifting and glorious. Up words are uplifting. At the end of class in the dead pose on the floor, I gave myself a big hug too. Dead pose is my most favorite pose of all. You lay there, do not move, and do nothing, melting into the floor. I had a great nights sleep and I feel wonderful this morning. Off to the dentist for a check up. Mature MILF Porn Blog Zoe Zane
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Sunday night nightmares, I had a hard time going to sleep and when I did I woke up in a scary nightmare. Demons were hacking away at my Dad's house. On the roof top was a wicked witch, in the court yard where two demons on the ground. I called OUT to banish them. The witch flew off the 2 demons stayed. Oh NO!
Monday night I had a great nights sleep. When I don't sleep good Bikram yoga is difficult. I'm on Day 53 for my 60 straight days Bikram challenge. My friend George and I shake our heads at ourselves for doing the summer challenge. Why do we torture ourselves so much? That is a very puzzling question. We're not sure why we did this challenge. It has been a mild summer, lucky for us. The back part of the studio has the summer sun blasting in on us. The 430 PM PST class is brutal. I will say this about me and the 430 class..... I am overcoming the heat. I have gone several times in this challenge. Am I getting better, is my liver getting better? I think so!
Sometimes I am hot before I go into the class. I am so tired of being hot before I go into class and the sun blasts right in my eyes in the dead pose. I tell myself I'm a blast of sunshine over and over with a tiny smile on my face. Right now only my great friends in yoga help me out. If you are new to me on your yoga mat and get in my mat space I don't like it. In the final days of the challenge, hold on tight baby till the end. I have flipped off a few teachers when they were not looking, I do not like their macho attitudes. It's macho men who turned Bikram and still have attitude.
One more challenge: get rid of all the spider webs in my Dads yard. I will go over early and sweep them out over the next week. Getting ride a negative energy with a broom. Spiders don't not scare me. I'm the spider sweeperand all the spiders will get a new home. friends. Run run away to the nextdoor neighbors all my spider friends. HA HA HA
Sunday, August 22, 2010
I think I will sneak a camera down to the pool just before the end of the summer. I have a yoga friend that might let me use his underwater camera. Oil up my big tits and glide through the water in my tight bikini. I have this bright yellow/hot pink bikini that I love. My bikini top has the word pink on the front.
Friday, August 20, 2010
I am holding on right now with everything. If I get freaky I go to my breath and focus on it. It calms me down. Right now I will trust the Universe to take care of me. At home with the 3 princess boy cats. Need to take a shower and get out of my sweaty yoga clothes. Some of you might think it looks hot in wet clothes. How about a hot shower with me? yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Too funny funny funny....to my sexy brain when some bi-lingual guy who mumbles low and mushes his words together...he begs to fuck my ass. Ass fucking is so in right now. I wonder what what will be the next fucking porn wonder sex act??? Hey stud, we are fucking my pussy right now and I want to cum! I just ignore the mumbling begging guy who wants ass! I didn't laugh at him when I was fucking him. Next time I might in a big fit of orgasm. Yowie, cumming, screaming and laughing at same time....!@#$%^&*(......***.... ahhhh! Like my AAA ass pic? ha ha ha ha ha
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
One time, I awallowed a shinny black guys dick that was over 10 inches with my head hanging over the couch at a San Jose swing club called "Nitelife" fun by Lee and dawn. Whew! That was a long sentence. I shocked myself. Not all big fuckers over 10 inches can I awallow right to the end of the shaft. It all depends on the size and shape of the head and dick. Look at the image of a black muscular guy his huge monster dick. I could not swallow this black dick. Not ever!
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
you know the funny character in Lord of the Rings. I was over at Dad's house going through memorabilia etc. The big Fatso 450 lb brother in law feels sorry for this homeless guy. The homeless Smeagol is doing yard work hired by Fatso. Homeless Smeagol is asking for stuff from Dad's house. Birds of feather flock together when it comes to snatching up what they can. I know Fatso is a gold digger smooching up to my baby sister, his wife, he abused for years. She is furious at Fatso right now. I wonder why?
This is the story of my dysfunctional "mid-century California modern" family. I want to meet one person who has their shit together. Please find me!
I'm leaving the house and asked the neighbor if Dad's house is an Eichler. It's not but a Mackay. Joseph Eichler was influenced by Frank Lloyd Wright and his contemporary style architecture. John Mackay and Eichler competed against each other in the house market from 1950's to 1970's.
The neighbor has a neck brace around her neck. Accident... and her neck is fused together. Miss Neck Brace made sure, very very clear, when we sell the house it must be disclosed that someone died in the house (California law). Over and over like a broken record. Leave it to a broken neck to shove the facts in your face. She did not say she was sorry my Dad died. I wonder if Dad helped her? He helped alot of people on his street after Mom died. Maybe Dad and Neck Brace did not like each other. LOL. So she spewed OFF in my face! eeK. Someone will buy the house. People die in houses all the time. At least Dad was not murdered. Noted: it's possible his death was accidental since he fell to the floor cracked his face with a small head injury. He died a week later. Head injuries are sneaky. They can be small and later get bigger. I like writing this blog story BC I can call people names and say what I think. They will not read this blog. They are to buzy being dysfuntional in California
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Some things must go on my Dad's property. Mr. Fatso BIL, take over, tell everyone what to do about my Dad's property and estate is not on the will. He will be gone very soon. He's allowed to watch the house. But, he does not get it. He's the loud obnoxious house watcher? Laughing again. I told him, this is my Dad's house, my Dad is not your Dad, and I am the first born daughter. He's probably on withdrawal from Dad's morphine and NyQuil??? Now that the morphine is gone, he's been drinking Dad's year supply of NyQuil. It was cheap and Dad used it to go to sleep. Oh well, my Dad was a NyQuil junky. LOL. Did my Dad use it for after shave too? HA HA HA ...
I will not turn Fatso into the authorities. I would love to see him go crazy on a bed at night in one of his drunk rants, his insane FITS over life. My younger sister told me what she has to deal with. He screams, yells, is a spaz all over the bed in a drunken rage in his 450 pound body. When she told me what she has to deal with it, she and I had a big belly laugh. When I see him I will picture him in a drunken rant and laugh!
Friday, August 13, 2010
My younger sister is pleading with me to not go over BC her bully asshole, motor mouth husband is freaking out when I'm over there. She does not want him to take it out on her. Yesterday he was telling me to not do this or that, I was wondering why, I'm cool. This is why? He and I had a conversation about using my Dad's morphine. I confronted him and only him. He knows I know since the hospice care giver asked for the bottle and he had to walk to HIS ROOM for the morphine. He is so scared I will tell or turn him in. He's chain smoking like no tomorrow. He told my abused sister he will never hit her again. Whatever. He's on the edge. His mind did it to himself. I only talked once to him about using Dad's drugs. His mind is churning over and over and he's majorly stressed out. This is good. Let him sweat! Mature zoe zane porn blog - so does my family think I'm a vice cop or a freight train? HA HA HA
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Like totally terrible yesterday, all these hardcore men calling, telling me they wanted to shove their huge dicks up my ass. This phone is for business not my dirty ass! Must be out of work and bored with their hard dicks. They need a dick management drug with for their nut balls and minds. HA HA HA
GROSS RUDE AGGRESSIVE ABUSIVE RANTS from idiot men.
Get this: I want to buy some DVD from you. I told him to email me about this inquiry. He told me he did not have a computer, acted dumb, what is the site name, what is your email, on and on. Hey DUDE how did you get my phone number? ah...was it your computer??? Heaven help me. I need a legend of angles with big hammers to knock these guys out.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Get over to Dad's house by Sunday and get what you want from Dad's house. Last night in yoga class, thinking, I went thur all my friends and called one this morning. I jumped on it. The house sitter man bitch bully was there AND not awake. The house is locked up. I was ready to jump the fence and climb thur a window. The movers are here get your pants on buddy. He's fuming. Successful people do not please other people. He had all his stuff in the antique dresser that's mine. He wanted to clean it out himself. Okay bitch, I will go clear off other furniture to put in the big truck. My family is so disconnected and heartless. I was talking about my executor brother and the cheap coffin my Dad was buried in. You can buy a online coffin, something nice, for about $900. My close rich, Friend called by brother heartless. My Dad worked all his life to leave his kids something and was buried in a cremation coffin. My brother is a cheap, heartless Mormon bishop that ONLY cares about his precious reputation with his shallow church friends. No wonder some people are atheists and do not believe in God. Zoe Zane Mature Blog
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Yesterday was very busy. Long overdue, new tires for my car. I got them. Had to wait over 2 hours. Went to my spine adjuster, wrote out bills in the open air, now walk to mailbox and pay the bills. Where are they? eek! Then I realized, where I put my bills. I threw them in the dumpster with odds and ends. Oh no!!!!! I found them and dropped them in the mailbox. WHEW!
Sunday, August 08, 2010
Yesterday, I contacted 3 lawyers for estate dispute. It seems my executor brother has been neglected by me for 25 years. It's my fault I did not pay attention to him after I left the Mormon church. What he's really telling me....I'm pissed OFF at you for helping my Dad change the Will before he died. My executor brother and sister-in-law set a Will up just after my Dad almost died 2 years ago. It was 50% for them and 25% for my sister and I. Dad pulled out of hospice and saw what they did. He divided the Will to this..... 25% for each child (4 family members). When my brother and his wife found out they spilled their true feelings and said..... the added family member doesn't deserve to be on the Will, he doesn't know how to manage $$$. Dad and I made it right..... for his peace of mind. The last two years, your Zoe Girl made a huge attempt to mend whatever I could with my Dad. He needed a buddy and a friend. We helped each other bring closure to a life of abuse, angry and pain. My brother/his wife, my abused sister/her asshole husband are not good people. My fucked up family are so fucked UP! My Mormon bishop brother makes the Mormon church look bad. When all is said and done, I'll run like hell, get myself a new family. Actually I have 3 new families right now, all my children, my 3 cats and the yogis from my Bikram yoga studio. Now you know why I left the Mormon church. My executor brother is a loveless fake bully and a greedy motherfucker.
More is coming so stay tuned.....
I'm a stealth fighter jet. Soon they will get a taste of my stubborn asshole bitch Dad and Bikram himself all wrapped up in one in your Zoe Girl.
Saturday, August 07, 2010
I told my younger sister I did porn. After Dad dieing, her abusive barbaric, man bitch(husband) is yelling even more at her. I got a taste of it yesterday when I told him why I did not like him. I confided with my abused sister about my life to help her. She's so afraid of the man bitch, she turned on me. It's all my fault and I have divided the family. At lease my baby daughter is bonding with me more since the death of my Dad. She's been very confused for along time about herself. I told her I love her. We are breaking down the walls.
I was on the phone with the man bitch last night and could not get one word in with his loud threats. He knows about the con artist boyfriend and my porn life. He threaten to tell my religious brother the truth. SO I LIED to my sister. I told her I sold my porn site and will open up a Bikram Yoga studio after I finish teacher's training. She believed me.
At Dad's burial yesterday, my younger brother who is a Bishop in the Mormon church called me to repentance again in front of everyone. I want to speak at my Dad's memorial service. He is nervous I will ruin his fake Mormon Bishop reputation. I guess divorcing the first Mormon Bishop husband has scared him. GOOD! My small talk will be respectful at the service. It will be what Dad and I did to connect before he died. My stripper daughter told me, I'm the only child that connected with Dad. She's right. I'm done with abuse and dysfunction. I went to the funeral to make heart and love connections. I made some, but my fake religious brother slammed me again. I'll tell him not to do that to me anymore. I'm the first born child buddy boy. My Dad's casket was an eye shock. If the state would allow him to be buried in burlap he would of done it. His casket was made of pressed board not pinewood(under layment for wood floors). It was not water proofed. I guess it does not matter but he is the one with the estate and worked his whole life to give something back to his children. It made me sick and still does. My brother drives big fancy cars like porche and BMW. It made my stripper daughter cry to see my Dad's cheap casket and their rich I do not care attitude. My executor brother could of bought something more pleasing more durable. I would of stepped in and bought up. My Dad was a penny pincher, a cheap man. As the first born, I felt it all my life. On top of the box was the word head to make sure Dad was placed correctly in the ground. One of the grand daughter made a beautiful flower arrangements with many white flowers. It was a day of riding the roller coaster in the Mormon hell zone South San Francisco.
Mature MILF Porn Star Blog
Do not worry, I am not leaving the porn business. It's my calling to shake up the system and I'm ready. But sometimes you must lie to protect yourself from the self- righteous egotistical fake-oids.
Friday, August 06, 2010
everything. It was so real. He told me what to tell the family members. It will be interesting to see what they think and feel. Dad laid the bomb on me to set things right. Here we go-----Miss Zoe your Smart Ass Bitch with the religious family freaks.
Thursday, August 05, 2010
The Art of Happiness: A Handbook for Living [Book] by Dalai Lama XIV, Dalai Lama, Howard C. Cutler
An updated edition of a beloved classic, the original book on happiness, with new material from His Holiness the Dalai Lama and Dr. Howard Cutler. Nearly every time you see him, he's laughing, or at least smiling. And he makes everyone else around him feel like smiling. He's the Dalai Lama, the spiritual and temporal leader of Tibet, a Nobel Prize winner, and a hugely sought-after speaker and statesman. Why is he so popular? Even after spending only a few minutes in his presence you can't help feeling happier. If you ask him if he's happy, even though he's suffered the loss of his country, the Dalai Lama will give you an unconditional yes. What's more, he'll tell you that happiness is the purpose of life, and that "the very motion of our life is toward happiness." How to get there has always been the question. He's tried to answer it before, but he's never had the help of a psychiatrist to get the message across in a context we can easily understand. The Art of Happiness is the book that started the genre of happiness books, and it remains the cornerstone of the field of positive psychology. Through conversations, stories, and meditations, the Dalai Lama shows us how to defeat day-to-day anxiety, insecurity, anger, and discouragement. Together with Dr. Howard Cutler, he explores many facets of everyday life, including relationships, loss, and the pursuit of wealth, to illustrate how to ride through life's obstacles on a deep and abiding source of inner peace. Based on 2,500 years of Buddhist meditations mixed with a healthy dose of common sense, The Art of Happiness is a book that crosses the boundaries of traditions to help readers with difficulties common to all human beings. After being in print for ten years, this book has touched countless lives and uplifted spirits around the world.
When you are in a great space and happy others can feel it. It is very powerful.
Wednesday, August 04, 2010
Yesterday, I was gathering up vintage girdles for photos. Julia www.ffstockings.com and I are into 1950's stockings. After I take pics in my white vintage girdles, I will dye them different colors like pink, lavender, lime green. Sounds yummy Hugh! I like different colors that are coordinated together with bras, panties, girdles and stockings with a antique slip. I find the vintage clothing in second hand stores, fetish girlfriends give me clothing when they move, and Julia lets me wear her girdles in photo shoots. It is nice to to have nice friends. Oh, and some of my slaves send me a present in the mail. I love that. I wear the girdle in a special photo set just for them. Julia live in Canada. I have been invited up for a big pic/vid shoot. I need a new passport to get into Canada.
This morning I have 2 guests at my house. My stripper daughter and baby daughter drove down for the burial of my dead Dad. Organizing his death is up in the air. We are waiting for the county health department and his doctor to sign for his official death certificate. Must have a death certificate to bury Dad in South San Francisco cemetery. What day? I hope tomorrow.
Tuesday, August 03, 2010
I will not linger long on this subject so be patient. Now family member's are fighting over belongings in Dad's house. My sister's hubby who is not on the will is telling everyone what he wants. I told my sister to tell him to back off. I went over there yesterday to make sure he gets the message to shut the fuck up. He went on and on about how he stayed up all night and now has a migraine. I asked for Tom's phone number who is on the will. He asked me how I was doing. I said nothing and turned away. I kept my comments to myself and went to yoga class. Show some respect for the dead and the living buddy. My quiet way was more than the 400 lb bully could stand. My sister and I will work it out. He is not in the will. Just BC you took care of Dad at the end does not give you the right to tell his children what they can and can not have. It is not his place. He was drinking alcohol, smoking cigarettes and shooting up morphine. My executor brother and wife do not know. I will keep it a secret only for my younger sister who he has bulled and controlled for years. She needs some time to gather her strength to set him straight. My Dad gave him spending money and feed him. He doesn't have a job. So thank you and good bye. Like Doris Duke would say, "You can go now!" Doris Duke was the richest women in the world at 21 in the 1930's.
Monday, August 02, 2010
Stripper daughter is sobbing over my dead Dad and her DEAD dog. Both died the same day. eeK! Kurby, her dog helped her through a huge life change. Oh fuck. Then my sister calls and tells me her bully husband's Mother is dieing. On top of this my Dad's sister is in the 4th stage of kidney failure SLC, Utah Hospice. AND, my dead Dad's brother's wife has breast cancer. One thing I know, I'm going to my Bikram yoga class and get ride of the stinking thinking and crap from Mormonism. Yesterday, I watched my brother bully his wife, he tried it on me. I just let him ramble on. I know what I need to do for myself. Besides he's my baby brother and I'm older and bolder (first born child). Just let him feel like he is God. The Mormon church attracts women haters. I watched my younger Bishop brother, my sister's bully FAT hubby and Tom (son of my second younger sister who is in a mental lock down ward for crazy) go on and on about what they THINK they know. They know nothing. All 3 males hold the priesthood. It's what you DO not what you say that counts. If this is what the church has for it's leadership, I'm well done and over it, FOREVER, from the Mormon church. I already knew what my sister's bully husband was doing with my Dad's drugs. He's on his last leg, so negative. When I watched the Authorised Hospice Nurse of the Dead finalized my Dad's death, he asked to have all the drugs. I knew the 400 pound blow heart was shooting himself up with Dad's morphine. The head hospice coordinator was questioning why the fatso brother-in-law WAS "so out of it". Yeah, he was drugged out on morphine. That's why he was so out of it for 12 hours. LOL. What bothers me the most, you can not trust his fat ass! Now he's taking possession of things in Dad's house and telling people what to do. He's not on the will, my sister is. I see and tell it like it is, baby cakes.
Sunday, August 01, 2010
He heard me. I told him he did not have to go out hard even though he broke his femur, it healed, and then last Sunday he feel down and broke his face with a small head injury. Yesterday, the Doctor thought he might have 2 weeks. He died 2 minutes before noon today. I have had some kind friends be there for me today. I sobbed my heart out by his bedside. Zoe Zane
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